April 29th, 2024
I did not realize that I have not written in 3 days.
What was I doing friday that I completely forgot to write?
The weekends are usually pretty busy with my children at home so I am not surprised if I miss a day on the weekend on accident.
Well it’s Monday.
Last week we left off with me having the realization that I have to promote myself and that has been my biggest sticking point thus far.
I realize that I am not alone in it. I found a short book from the library about a woman who was dealing with her own struggles with promoting herself. The way she describes how she felt, is exactly how I feel. The interesting thing is that she wrote this book over 20 years ago.
While I’m not completely surprised that a person such as myself could feel what someone else felt 20 years ago, it makes me feel so much better and that I am not so alone. That if she can overcome it, so can I.
Overall I have been in such a funk for the last 4 weeks. I mean since the girls spring break, then Josh getting bad news from work. I just have not been able to pull myself together. I’m tired. I feel anxious. I feel depressed. Not anything that I was hoping i’d feel when I set off on this new adventure.
I feel the pressure to get a new job, and yet I’m still on the journey to build my Teddi Kathleen Brand.
I also suppose that there isn’t even a need for it. I could be just spinning my wheels on an idea of something that no one will want to buy anyway. So maybe a form of self promotion is to just get a bunch of feedback.
See if what I am doing is viable. Before I continue to pour myself into it, and to not worry if people will like it or not, I can ask for feedback.
This whole self promotion thing has been tail spinning me like crazy. At some point, I get to say enough is enough. Take control back. Stand in my power again.
I feel like I’ve given all my power away. Away to the circumstances around me.
Going through it, I can see that it is just part of my journey.
Who am I committed to being?
CEO of my company
Healthy
Vibrant
Self-Promotion - Personal Brand
What is my personal brand? What do I stand for? How do I market myself? How can I use my skills to help us make $100,000 a year?
I mean, this really is my year of practice.
Practice self-promotion and build my personal brand.
What Do I want to be known for?
Is there a job for me out there that allows me to foster my skills?
I just feel stuck, I still don’t know where to channel my energy.
Finding a job.
Learning how to promote myself.
It always comes back to the “can I do both?”
I just spent the last two hours looking for jobs. I just feel so defeated. The weight of all the question marks around me is so heavy.
Am I just applying for jobs because its easier than working on promoting myself?
I feel like I have no energy to do anything. I didn’t sleep well last night, yet I dont want to take a nap because I’d like to sleep well tonight.
I don’t really feel like working out.
I’m lacking direction which is causing me to lack energy.
I don’t know where to focus my energy.
I decided to apply to several recruiting agencies, because applying for jobs on my own isn't working.
The idea of having to learn all of this on my own is exhausting.
I just wish I could get some answers.
I just wish I could just get myself to practice self promotion.
When will I be ready? I know I wont feel ready, I just have to get out and do it.
I just still feel stuck….
When will this end?
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