Day 16 - I realized I don't know what I'm doing

“I assumed that because I've run my own business before that I should have success out the gate.”

Hello! If you're new around here, my name is Krystal and I've committed to journaling every day for a year. I write these raw journal entries. What is unique about my style of writing is that I don't necessarily follow the rules or writing. My aim is to write as closely to how I talk. What you will also find in my journal entries is transparency. I give you front row seat to my inner dialogue. That inner critic who shows up from time to time, I show you exactly when it shows up and how I shift. My hope is that I inspire you to keep on going despite what your inner critic is telling you in the moment.

March 15th, 2024

This is not a quantity over quality. Quite the contrary. It is quantity, to get the reps in so that I get much better at the quality.

My initial intention was to just write and allow whatever to come up, to come up. Even the inner critic as well. This was to show you that the inner critic is a real issue to deal with and to show how I was overcoming it. Over the last 15 days I’ve been able to tune into what are the things my inner critic was saying to me that were keeping me stuck. Which was super insightful 

Then, yesterday I had an epiphany. 

I realized all the things that my inner critic was saying to me was around the topic of money. I realized how much pressure I was putting on myself to make money. 

I had left a career where I was making $150,000 and did a complete 180 degree turn to go and do something different. Now I make virtually 0 dollars. 

So I was putting so much pressure on myself to come out the gates and quickly scale my businesses up to $150,000. 

Well, sure that is possible at some point, but I’m needing to learn an entire new career! 

Yes, I left my previous career before I had learned this new skill, but I had never had that perspective before. 

I never realized that this would be an entirely new career for me and that I would actually need to start from zero. 

With that perspective, would I have decided to learn this new career before I quit my job? Maybe? 

I also assumed that because I've run my own business before that I should have success out the gate as well.

But again, I’ve had to humble myself, and give myself grace. 

This is an entirely new career for me. I get to learn a bunch of new skills in this new career. 

The thing though that I like about this career is that the possibilities and earning potential really are endless. 

So it excites me to take the skills I do have from my previous career, and blend it with my creativity to make something completely new.

So yeah, I’m here to learn. I’m going to continue to write my daily journals because I think they are helpful. However I’ll likely spend less time on what the inner critic is saying unless I start to hear new things come up, but my main focus will be writing about what I’m doing and what I'm learning. 

Thanks for hanging out!Much love,

Krystal